The Art of Letting Go

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive the person who hurt you, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

              The past few week, days or even hours have been very stressful for me. Am I that bad person to be mistreated like this or is it the other way around?! I am trying hard to understand everything, to just give way to their anger and bitterness cause I know the past experiences in life brought her to that attitude, her outlook towards life. I was praying "Lord give me more patience and strength." But isn't it "We can't use our past as an excuse to stay in bondage to a negative, defeated and ungodly approach to life?" With all the things happening around me, I know God is giving me a purpose for this, He is molding me to become a stronger person, to be matured enough to handle difficult people, to be calm, focused  and a good Christian as we should have to be. As the book of Peter says,

Suffering for Doing Good

1Peter 3:8-17

       Finally all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit blessing. For, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil." Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened." But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.

                             

"God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble"

1 Peter 5:6-11

         Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist Him, standing firm in the Faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you firm, strong and steadfast. TO Him be the power forever and ever. AMEN.

               God has a plan for us but the enemy has a plan for us too. So we should be well balanced, vigilant, and cautious at all times. God's plan for us is to be more than conquerors in Christ. We should not be enslaved to enemy's plan, to be imprisoned by our  negative emotions. I admit I am still hurting, I sometimes want to give up but God is always there, He is kind and always faithful. Thank You Lord God for your words I always  feel relieved and comforted. And with all those trials, my family especially my parents keep me going, they are my inspiration. They always inspire me to do good, to be a responsible person, to be a daughter of God. They always remind me that I am truly blessed, for I have a loving and supportive parents, a complete and happy family. I always learned lessons the hard way. As I always say,

      "People do come and go, even your closest friend, bestfriend can leave you but your family will just be there for you no matter what." 

---It is finding meaning and purpose in our day to day experiences, may it be good or bad; we should know that God yearns for us to take joy in our journey, to live life according to His purpose---

           

enriquez-de jesus wedding. a union of love :)

  Their story is not a typical dating or courtship thing, theirs is how I called the "love on line". My cousin Kuya Sander is working and living in Canada while Jade is from here in Singapore. Truly, love will find a way. They get to know each other through my facebook and the rest is history. And I am glad I became part of their love story. I became an instant match maker. 

  I always been a fan of beautfiul weddings, I love to see how two people give their vows to each other. And I always imagine myself having my heaven sent groom. 

          A mother will always be there for her daughter, sharing the perfect moment. The smile in her lips expresses how much she is grateful for her mom, and made me teary eyed on that moment. 

                                      The wedding was also like a semi reunion for Enriquez clan. I was happy to see some of my Tita's, Tito's, cousins, and most especially a photo booth with Mom and Dad. It was FUN! :) 

                                            After two years of being workmates, being on the same area; this is our first time to be together on leave. That was really exciting, our fun moments together, cam-whoring, "chismisan". Yna is not just like a housemate, a room mate, a workmate. She is like my "ate" in SG. :) 

 A photo with the beautiful bride. It's really amazing how you meet people not by chance, it is always has a purpose. And I am glad I became a purpose for your fairy tale. Welcome to the Enriquez Family Jade :)  

  

 And as for me I will wait for that perfect moment, the moment I will say "I do", the moment I will proud to say this groom is truly a God's gift. God is preparing me to be the woman He wanted me to be. I know.. 

Happy Mother's Day

To the most beautiful person inside and out, the woman of God, my superhero, my very best friend, my wonderful mother. Happy Happy Mother's day. I may not be there always to support you, but i just you to know that all the hard work that I do is for our family, and especially you. I have been a witness to all your sacrifices for our family, for always keeping us together, for being the strongest person when all of us our being weak, for being the best daughter to your parents i know that, for being the best midwife to our barangay, for being a great friend to all your friends, everything being rolled up into one.  

As i reached this stage, I already understand why you have been so  strict with me the  past years. Truly, a mother will always just wants the best for her children, Thank You for always reminding me to be a good person, for teaching me the good values. I am the woman I am today is because of you. I always look up to you. I could never sum up into words all the gratitude I have that God gave me a mother like you, I am always thankful and proud that I am your daughter. 

I miss our chikahan moments, when i always make "lambing" to massage me before i sleep, your "lutong bahay", your being OC to my things, for being a funny critic. I will see you soon, I am so excited to be with you and dad again, this time I promise I will pamper you. :)

P.S I will always be your ton-ton :) 

Thanks Mommy for being our super woman. WE LOVE YOU! HAPPY HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY :)

And here's a song for you.... 

                                                      Mama- Spice Girls 

The Encounter

       
           For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV) 

I was inspired to do this blog because of the movie, "The Encounter"  

Synopsis:  Stranded in the middle of nowhere, five strangers take refuge in a deserted roadside diner. An arrogant businessman, a lonely woman, an estranged couple, and a teen runaway, they appear to have nothing in common.But the Christlike proprietor seems strangely all-knowing and offers more than temporal nourishment.

      I fell in love with the movie or should I say, I was emotionally stricken by it that my tears was overflowing. It is scriptually deep and very accurate answers are given to very difficult life issues. The answers to life's question are offered with compassion. And here I am telling the story of my life that somehow will make you understand why i wrote this blog. 

 ------       2 years ago, I was just a happy, contented and a loving girlfriend to a man I thought was perfect, I thought I could already spend my life with. I never planned to work overseas, but that that's the only way I know I could escape to my strict parents and later on prove to them that they should let go of me, approve to our plans to finally settle down. "That was the original plan"... Not  until something happened that changed my life...           

         April 2011 I came to Singapore, gathered with strength and courage to conquer a different world away from my loved ones together with my motivation of having a good future with my "fiancee". I always believed with our relationship, that we are strong enough to face all the problems, that we can survive in a long distance relationship, but as they say "Promises are made to be broken"... One month later, without a clear explanation; he broke up with me.. That was the most painful, heartbreaking moment of my life. I was lost, confused, mentally distracted, emotionally torn, spiritually malnourished. I had so many questions in my mind, "What have i done to make me experience like this?!" "Am i really not good enough?!" "What will i do with my life without him?! " "Should i go home or stay?!" I tried to hold on, fight for him, trying to save the relationship though I am already losing my self respect and pride. Pain was excruciating, every night I would fall sleep because my eyes are already tired from crying. And without shame telling you this, I even tried to hurt myself just to beg for his attention and pity. But sadly, it didn't work. It was really hard for me knowing I have no family and trusted friends here. The only friend I have that time was Hazel, a former UST colleague, a good friend and a fully devoted Christian. She would always tell me positive things, that I should see the break up as opportunity to be a better girlfriend or maybe an eye opener for me that "Christian" (yes that was his name) was not the one God has planned for me. She always prays for me. She gave me some Christian books to read, some things to do for me to divert my attention and time, and she suggested to read the Bible. 

     “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 NIV)

          When I always open the Bible it amazes me how God is talking to me through His words, and I always ended up crying. It helps me a lot to cope up. And that was the moment I felt something different, that I am longing for something. Until that time Hazel invited me to attend their service. Feeling uncertain about it, I accepted her invitation. It's something new for me because i grew up in a family of devoted Catholic. Yes I always pray, I always go to church every Sunday but this one is totally different. I didn't know what to expect. As I entered the room, people greeted me with a warm smile, it's like people know each other very much. Having that positive attitude, I welcomed the new experience with a hope that I will find the answers to my questions. And yes somehow, I find the answers to my questions. That was finding the real essence of my existence, a beginning of good relationship with our creator, God.  First few months are smooth sailing, my broken heart was healing faster, and I knew I already moved on. But my biggest dilemma I had that time was how will I tell to my parents that i am beginning to attend a Christian service,that I am beginning to take a different path. I know they will be shocked that they will think I am converting to another religion.  I still continue to attend Sunday services without telling my parents about that.  And then I  felt I am already okay with my life. I am ready to take another chance of falling in love again. I thought I was ready. Until I met someone, I became busy and already forget about everything. Again, I am back to my old self. Willing to do anything just for the sake of being loved in return, I devoted my time and attention to him. In some ways, I felt happy, but not loved. I didn't get what i want. Again, i questioned my self "What's wrong with me?". I was hurting, for the nth time. Again, I began to pray. I asked for another chance, for me to find the answers to my questions... I kept my heart sensitive to His voice, to follow His promptings, I know He spoke to my heart and led me to the way I should go. And just like the prodigal son as I am, I went back and ask for His forgiveness. 
             
            " But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His son, purifies us from all our sins" (1 John 1:7) 

          And truly, God will never fail you. He is always faithful to His servants. He has his own ways of bringing you back in His loving arms. That was the time someone invited me for a Christian Life Program for SfC. I told myself, "I guess this is the one I've been waiting for, the answered prayer." Maybe this time I could be proud to tell my parents because they are also part of the CFC, that I wouldn't have a dilemma about it. And then I began my journey with Him exactly one year ago. 

SVDP CLP batch 2012

                  I am thankful to where I am now, these people made a big impact in my life, in my life being a Christian. They made me open my heart and mind to the Lord, to fully accept His love, forgiveness, and blessings. I became more appreciative with my family, friends, work, to the people around me, to see goodness in every bad things, to the people I've encountered in the past because I already understand that everything has its reasons, everything has its purpose. And recently together with my household, we we watched this movie "The Encounter", I let out everything I have kept in my heart the whole time. I cried my heart out because i can really relate to the movie. I felt Jesus talk to me the way He talked to Melissa in the movie. "Melissa, I have so much in store for you, only if you will trust me. You have a very tender heart. How many guys have you fallen in love with? It's just not my will for a couple to be unequally matched. Isn't it more important for a guy to love Me more than he loves you? I promise you, remember, I have many wonderful things in store for you"....The message was very clear and  now I understand everything. It's not the material things, it's not someone who will complete you, will bring you happiness. It's being contented in  what you have, and I am proud to say I already have the best relationship, the relationship with Jesus, with our Creator. It's also not the religion that matters it's about knowing Jesus, knowing God. I am just thankful for my household, sisters, nanays, tatays, brothers; for always leading me to the right path.It's like having a second family here in Singapore. They are my wingless angels indeed, one of my greatest blessings.

                   I am not saying I am already free from sins, cause sinners as we are; I still fail, I always stumble and fall. But God is faithful. God is love. He will always forgive us. Believe me, He is just there. That small voice you hear within your heart. We just need to have FAITH. 

"Now Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" Hebrews 11:1

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The old has gone, the new is here!" 2 Corinthians 5:17

"Lord, Thank You for your unfailing love. Thank You Jesus for your message that inspires me to share this. Thank You for being my Savior, my best friend, brother, my Healer, everything that I need. I always ask for your guidance. You already know what's in my heart. Make me the woman i deserve to be. All Glory to God. Amen."

my journey being a nurse..

         "Nursing is an art; and if it is made to be an art, it requires an exclusive devotion as hard as preparation, as any painter's or sculptor's work; for what is having to do with the canvass or dead marble, compared with having to do with the living body, the temple of God's spirit. It is one of Fine Arts: the finest of Fine Arts."

       This is one of my favorite quotes from the founder of nursing herself, Florence Nightingale. But how do I begin explaining and telling you all about Nursing. They always say nurses are just like nannies, assistant of doctors, a low level profession. And just like any other nurses, I am always hurt by this connotations. The first question is... What does it mean to be a nurse? Nursing for me is a heart and soul experience, it requires your whole being to be involve in the profession. It is a roller coaster ride experience of your emotions. You tend to laugh and cry a lot. You are surrounded by challenges and carrying an immense responsibility but at the same time a little authority. You step into people's lives and making a difference every single day. Some people will bless you, while others will curse you. You see people at their best and at their worst. You will never cease to be amazed at people's capacity to love, to have the courage and endurance. You will see life begins and life ends. You must be flexible enough in dealing with people's emotions. But the most important thing being a nurse is you will know what it is to be human and to be humane. No book can teach us how to cry with a patient, and to show compassion with them. It's about being able to LOVE people when they are their weakest moments. Being a 
      
                         Nurse is what I love most, it is because it is all about being who I am.. 

                                I landed on this job way back 2011 when I  was having  high hopes of my future together with my boyfriend. (well, that was a different story) I prayed for this, to be able to continue my work being an OR nurse. Luckily I did. The past 2 years has been a struggle for me, I had ups and downs.  To be strong despite all the challenges, despite all the changes. And to cope up working and living in a foreign land,  it was really hard... "Change is constant, we must accept it because someday we will know if that changes will bring something better in our lives. But sometimes, changes can hurt us.. as we could never imagine." 

                                Major part of my nursing career was me being a staff nurse in this prestigious hospital. I spent almost 3 years of my life here, I can say this is one of the fulfillment of my dreams. I dream of becoming an alumnus of this school wherein fact this is the only school I took an entrance exam out of hundreds of nursing schools in Manila, but I didn't make it. As I promised to myself I will go back here, and it did happen. I know I was meant to be here. Most of the people I worked with are already part of my life, I gained friends that I can say I will keep for the rest of my life. My mentors, seniors, doctors, and even the "ate's kuya's manang's" became part of being who I am as a nurse and as a person. A lot of memories to be treasured I must say.. I miss UST....

                                   Sadly, I had no pictures in my facebook when I was in BDH, the starting point of my career. A crazy, fun, memorable experience. I will always be thankful for my mentors. You know who you are.. 

"The character of the nurse is just as important as the knowledge she possesses" It's all about making a difference, touching lives of the people, and patients may forget our names but they will never forget how we made them feel. 

---"Lord, I  may be whining and complaining about my work but help me remember that I am blessed to have this job. Amen"